Will Rogers

Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach.

Will Rogers

Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.

Will Rogers

Tax relief, farm relief, flood relief, dam relief – none of these have been settled, but they are getting them in shape for consideration at the next session of Congress with the hope that those needing relief will perhaps have conveniently died in the meantime.

Will Rogers

Technocracy wants to do everything by machinery. Machinery is doing just fine. If it can’t kill you, it will put you out of work.

Will Rogers

Ten men in the country could buy the world and ten million can’t buy enough to eat.

Will Rogers

Terrible to have a law telling you you got to do something. But you ain’t going to do it unless there is.

Will Rogers

That’s the trouble with our charities; we are always saving somebody away off, when the fellow next to us ain’t eating.

Will Rogers

That’s the trouble with a politician’s life somebody is always interrupting it with an election.

Will Rogers

The American people are a very generous people and will forgive almost any weakness, with the possible exception of stupidity.

Will Rogers

The American people will vote dry as long as they are able to stagger to the polls.

Will Rogers