George Carlin

Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.

George Carlin

Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s.

George Carlin

We think in language. The quality of our thoughts and ideas can only be as good as the quality of our language.

George Carlin

Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but not to where the guilt is.

George Carlin

Every person you look at, you can see the universe in their eyes, if you’re really looking.

George Carlin

Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

George Carlin

The secret of success is doing something you love, doing it well and being recognized for it.

George Carlin

There’s a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it.

George Carlin

A lot of these people who keep a gun at home for safety are the same ones who refuse to wear a seat belt.

George Carlin

Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.

George Carlin